A Lesson in Dealing with Attention Seekers

As a Special Education major, I experience daily a very unique crowd of people in my classes. Special Education is a major that draws in all sorts of people, the loud and eccentric, the quiet and reserved, the intellectual and refined. And then theres me.

I don't really know what to classify myself as so we'll call me.. the sarcastic asshole of the group.
But I'm mostly only a sarcastic asshole in my head so it's no big deal.

Anyways, a few weeks ago in class while discussing disorders and disabilities, ADHD came up. The topic itself is not too unique to the field of Special Education, as it is listed under the IDEA as 'other health impairments'.

The awkward twist on the story is I myself am diagnosed with ADHD, and until this day, I did not think about how awkward discussing how to help students with ADHD would be.

I myself am medicated and have been for a few years now. I like to say, I'm a 'controlled crazy', but it's true that if i'm off my meds don't expect to get much out of me that's productive. When I'm not medicated I'm pretty much just hungry, lazy, and forgetful.

But this story isn't about me and my problems, because to be honest, we all know my life is depressing and awkward and weird and that's fine. No need to dwell on my ADHD too long, my attention span won't last anyways (ADHD jokes... always good).

As the teacher explained ADHD and the symptoms, side-effects of medicating, etc. I realized I'm a freak-zoid (though what else is new). People raised their hands and shared stories of people they knew who had ADHD, family members who struggled in school, etc. All good fun, you know, talking about us loser struggling ADHD kids. I spent no time announcing my ADHD to the class, because I felt it was irrelevant, I myself found no need to explain my personal experience to the class and bore them, the professors slides told it all.

Though I will admit when we watched a video about how hard it was for a girl with ADHD to make friends I had the urge to jump up and scream "I swear we aren't all socially challenged!! I have plenty of friends!!".... I refrained for fear me screaming that would prove we are all socially challenged.

The teacher then had a professor with ADHD that she worked with come in and explain her experience. At this point a very outspoken girl in the back row came out that she had ADHD (this was beginning to feel like an AA meeting of some strange sort, and I can't say I was enjoying it). For the next at least forty minutes we went on consoling this girl through her struggles with accepting her ADHD. She explained how stupid she felt and how she thought people found her dumb (If we think back to the 'You've just been subtly insulted!' post, this really fits, I felt insulted as always). For forty minutes the class became this girls personal counselor, as she explained to us she wanted to stay 'clean of medication' didn't want to 'change who she truly was to fit in' (I've just been subtly insulted! This girl made me seem like a teenager easily persuaded to drink by her friends). It's not the fact this girl had ADHD that pissed me off, it's the fact this girl acted as if she was the only one in the room with ADHD, that got to me.
It is remarkable I didn't stand up after 30 minutes of this and say "I am an example of why medication is good for a person."
Though I fully realized that would have been inappropriate, so clearly I did not.

But this story is not about how easily annoyed I am and how much of a sarcastic asshole I am. Let me tell you what I'm getting to.

People every single day are going to seek attention, they are going to get on your nerves, and they are going to find a way to make a small problem many people struggle with a big problem. It's our job as good people, to put up with it.
And let me tell you, I know it is REALLY hard sometimes.
But If I were to have stood up and countered her comments about medication being used for 'changing to fit in', then I would have been just as bad as she was. Attention seekers are everywhere, but when you see one, it's your job to let it go. Let attention seekers make their own mistakes, and as annoying as they are, don't make the mistake of trying to stop them or call them out.
It will change nothing and simply make you look bad.
Attention seekers can suck, but lord knows at some point you have probably done the same thing, so have a little sympathy no matter how annoying they can be.

The best way to handle this in my opinion?
Do what I do, let the sarcastic annoyed comments flow through your head, not your mouth, and then blog about it later to random people on the internet.

Or as always, the best way to handle any annoying situation?
Laugh at it.

Sincerely,
Laughing away.

You've Just Been Subtly Insulted!

Throughout your daily life, don't you find yourself sometimes hearing the thing's people say and thinking 'Wait, I think they just insulted me..' or 'If they think that then they must think that about me..'

I read a quote by Adele recently, or at least I read a quote on pinterest recently that said it was Adele's quote, so let's just assume pinterest is a valid source on this one.

"I have insecurities of course, but I don't hangout with anyone who points them out to me"

Now this made me think one thing at first, Adele clearly has hung out with some crappy people who pointed out her insecurities or something, because she sure doesn't sing happy songs.

But after that I thought about this in relation to my own life and I realized something, I hang out with a TON of people who point my insecurities out to me, just unintentionally. And I'm sure you can relate with me too. I'm sure theres a few people in your life you surround yourself with and sometimes the comments they make about themselves, end up making you feel like shit.

Let me give some examples of unintentional comments people around you may make, that make you feel like you've just been insulted.
(Recognize many of this is sarcastic and meant to be humorous)

• (For the females mainly) "Oh my god I have gotten so fat, I look like a whale." - says your 5'2, 105 lb friend. 

Well now things have just gotten very awkward. For one, people talking about their weight insecurities is just uncomfortable to begin with, because now you have to compliment them and call them skinny. But when my friends make comments like this (at least for me) I'm now looking at my friend thinking, well shit. I am like twice your size, so thank you so much you skinny bitch, for telling me I look like a whale. 

You've just been subtly insulted! But it's okay, your friend is just attention seeking, tell yourself that so you can sleep well at night. 

Sure maybe everyone doesn't do this, but if you didn't think like this before, I bet you do now. 

• (For anyone in school) "Wow I just did terrible on that test, a 75%? I might as well have just failed because I did terrible. I'm so stupid." 

Now, If you did well on this exam or better than this person, your home free but you should probably try to comfort them. 

But if you did not do well after this comment you're probably looking down at your test which has a 60% on it and thinking a few things. One, I did actually just fail. Two, if a 75% is terrible, I have reached a new level of terrible with my 60%. Three, this person just said they're stupid for getting a 75%, and I got 15% less than them (good thing you can still do math and rock at it, by the way) so clearly I should just drop out of school then. 

You've just been subtly insulted! But again, it's going to be okay. Because your friend is really the stupid one for saying they might as well have just failed, because clearly failing is worse than a 75% (I mean you know that from experience.. :) )

If you want to make this person uncomfortable though, point out you got a 60% after they made this statement, and watch them grovel. 

• (For anyone who wears clothes) "I hate when people wear brown and black together they look like colorblind freaks." 

First off, someone should point out to people who have this pet peeve of matching perfectly or dislike for people who wear brown and black together, that they should get a life because this apparent mismatch in these two colors still doesn't make much sense to me. But moving on. 

Let's imagine you're also wearing brown and black together as they say this. Well boom you've just been subtly insulted! 

But let's imagine rather, that you have worn brown and black together before, well you have just been called a colorblind freak (and if you are actually colorblind like my father, well, you've just been called a freak).

Alright so I guess that insult wasn't very subtle. 

But if you ever see this person wearing brown and black together after saying this, please call them out.

• (For anyone who has ever been attracted to someone) "Honestly, (insert name of someone you find attractive here)  is so ugly and has a terrible personality, I don't know how anyone could be attracted to him/her." 

Hahahah sorry I love this one. 

Alright so to start now you know this person thinks you like ugly people with terrible personalities, so looks like you really know how to pick em, congrats!

But now you are instantly questioning your attraction to this person, and you will probably never look at them without thinking of that comment again.

Or now you are thinking that whoever said this is straight crazy, and must not know what attractive looks like because THAT guy/girl is a perfect ten. 

Oh and from personal experience, If you do end up being with this 'ugly terrible personality' person at some point or another, you can be sure that the person who made this statement thinks your are straight crazy. 

You've just been subtly insulted! 

So I think I've just covered a spew of insecurities people have, weight, intelligence, style, and well attractions. Though my examples are very vague. 

So what is my point in pointing out that people around you are subtly pointing out your insecurities all the time, you just don't notice? 

Well one, to tell you that Adele is wrong and if you live life avoiding anyone who makes you feel insecure or who unintentionally make a comment that make you question yourself, then your going to live a very lonely life. Everyone makes mistakes and doesn't always think before they speak. You yourself may have read this and thought, 'shoot! I've said that!'. The world is full of subtle-unintentional-assholes, you probably have been one before, and that's okay. 

But the main reason I point out all these subtle insults that people may make unintentionally is (well to make you laugh but also) to teach you not to take things so personally. People may insult you outright or unintentionally make a comment that is insulting, either way, you shouldn't let it get to you. Because as you begin to realize people unintentionally make comments that are insulting to you all the time, then you can begin to realize that this happens to everyone.

I guess what I'm really trying to say through all this humor and sarcasm is to be confident in the things you do and who you are because you are going to be insulted wether you like it or not. And find a way to laugh at yourself. When situations like this occur, look at them and laugh at how stupid some comments people make are, and don't let it get to you. 

We've all got insecurities, We all deal with people pointing them out in one way or another.

It all depends on how you handle it.

And my advice as always on how to handle problems?

Laugh at it. 

Over and out. 

Sincerely, 

Laughing away. 

Welcome To My Comical Life

So to start my blog I thought I'd open with some emotional crap, because that's why people blog, right?

Last week, my boyfriend dumped me.

Actually, Hold on, Let's try that again.

Last week, my boyfriend dumped me over text message.

No, that's not good enough...

Last week, my boyfriend dumped me over text message while I was on spring break.

Alright actually, let's make this a little more comical, shall we?

Last week, my boyfriend dumped me over text message while I was on spring break , eating dinner at a hibachi restaurant, with my best friend and her grandparents.

I received the text message as the Chef chop-suey'd onions and showed off his magnificent 'onion flaming temple' or whatever that thing is called.

And after cursing out my ex in the bathroom stall and crying, I opened the stall door to a small Asian woman who looked at me as if I were Godzilla, and left the restroom.

What's the moral of this story? Well if you get dumped at a hibachi restaurant, the chef will most likely give you free shrimp. But past that, the moral is that my life is awkward. So awkward that it is funny. Because yes I almost started crying as that onion temple was displayed, and it wasn't because of the temples beauty (no offense to the chef, like I said, free shrimp). And yes I had 70 year old grandparents who I had just met, looking at me like "well shit, now what do we do? What's this girls name again anyways?". And yes, a small Asian woman ran from me in fear (for good reason).
But when you look at these moments that should be so hard and painful, as comical it all becomes easier. It's hard to cry about your sad life, when your busy laughing at the event displayed in a whole new light.

Now wasn't that better to listen to than some sob story of how things didn't work out and how heartbreaking life is?

Yes.

Because in order to survive in this extremely messed up world, you need to laugh.

And that's where I got the idea for this blog. I figured, if I can laugh at myself and it makes me feel better about crappy situations, maybe I should share stories of my hilariously sad-yet enjoyable life, so others can laugh along with me (or at me, that's up to you).

And though I hope you enjoy laughing along with me. I hope you also find yourself learning to laugh at yourself when shitty situations present themselves in your life.

Some examples so you can practice at home:
(this isn't actually to be practiced at home, and you can use these perspectives at your own risk, I just think it's fun to come up with silly positives)

You've just gotten into a car accident?

Well, if it's your fault, now you can tell people not to mess with you. You've got a record of running people off the road, now you've just made everyone laugh. Ps, your a shitty driver and that is fine, excuse for future accidents.
If it's their fault, your getting a new bumper! Hooray! Now you won't be taunted by the two small scratches on your bumper prior to the accident, shiny new bumper is on it's way. Oh and you can really play the sympathy card with your friends, your accident was so traumatic, drinks should be on them. Once you've fooled them, you'll be laughing, but this time at your friends, not your own misfortune.

How about you tripped in public and fell in a puddle? now you look like crap too, by the way.

Let's laugh about this ugly soaked new you because.. Congrats! You've created a new look, your officially a hipster, and don't worry only 98% of the people who see you walking around covered in crap will think your homeless.

And for my last example of the night, let's imagine you walk into a clear glass sliding door. Well crap, what now?

This is the perfect opportunity to let your friends know you are going blind and get sympathy. Kidding, there's no getting out of this one, find humor in the fact your like the crow in those windex commercials.


If you can't laugh at moments in your life that make you feel embarrassed or upset, you will remain embarrassed or upset. But when you begin to realize misfortune and problems are never going to disappear, then you need to start finding a way to conquer that embarrassment and anger by laughing AT YOURSELF.

Because we are all unlucky, and that's just fine with me.


Laugh away
Sincerely,
Laughing at myself.